On Another Note

I dressed, I packed, I drove, I registered and I danced. 

But so much of my life is lived between those words. To type them you would think that all happened in ten minutes - twenty minutes max - but it didn't. That was three hours and 15 minutes of my life that I can't get back. And it was worth EVERY SECOND!!

I really missed MDB over the last two weeks. My Christmas and New Year's Eve were full of family, friends, food and fun. And I missed MDB and ballet a good portion of it. When given the opportunity to really push myself during that two weeks - with different instructors, higher levels, intricate patterns - I faltered. 

Today, I pulled on my belly dance pants, sports bra and fitted tank with happiness. I packed up my ballet slippers and water bottle with glee. I smiled at David and hugged MDB. I even told them about my New Years Eve story. 

I happily stood at a new place at the barre. I didn't need to be in front tonight. I knew MDB would see me wherever I stood in class and she would correct me if I needed it or Double Dog Dare me to push outta my comfort zone. 

Class was really full tonight. There were 8 of us at the barre and two more on the additional barre. Class was 8 women and 2 men. MDB started with her usual plies with port de bras and chambres. Then we moved into tendus with demi to full pointe first, second and fifth - more tendus with alternating front and back foot. We flowed through degages with a coupe and straight legged frappes. We stretched and then we did grand battements. 

At one point, MDB gives someone a correction and she mentions that my shoulders are super flexible. But the correction didn't seem to have anything to do with me. Apparently the girl behind corrected her arms because she saw mine were different. To which I responded - What did that have to do with me?!?! To which MDB responded - I correct myself based on my comparisons to other dancers in the room when I could be doing just fine.  

We moved onto the floor for our adagio and followed with sissones. Side Bar, Menty and Physie were all silent. No funny commentaries - no side banter. I was completely present. I didn't disappear into my mind trying to make sense of what was happening. I could stay there. I made mistakes - my elbow wasn't always lifted, my turnout wasn't always right, my balance came and went.

Menty: We can do this. You have to crawl before you walk, and walk before you run.

I did. I didn't do it right every time, but I could do it. And I wasn't afraid of making a fool of myself. 

We move into petit allegro and we do the spins that I mentioned from Legs class. MDB calls it my spin - but I don't want to adopt sissones, glissades or assemblages as mine!! 

When class is over, I hug MDB again. I'm only going to see her twice this week. She makes class a safe place and I love her all the more for it. I wish there were more teachers like that.