Miss C or Missy

It was OH MY GOODNESS Cold outside tonight. At 5:36pm I made the decision to go to class anyway. MDB went through the hassle of finding subs, the least I can do is take my tuchus to class.

I walk in, register and head to Studio B. As I watch the pointe class dance to Sugar Plum fairies , I think about my upcoming trip to see the Nutcracker. I'm kinda looking forward to watching ballerinas crack nuts!! :) While I'm watching these feets of strength (pun intended), I'm unwinding my scarf, pulling off my gloves, unzipping my boots, rolling down my socks, and unbuttoning my coat - and just before you think this is a strip tease....let me remind you - it was 27 degrees outside!!  

Two regulars and one regular that has been MIA for a while are sitting with me on the bench watching the dancers. Three other people round the corner and one of them is our sub.  

Last night we had Little Red, tonight we had Miss C or Missy - if you say it quickly :)

She's about as tall as Little Red, but a brunette with blonde streaks in her hair. I've seen her around a lot, but I have little to no idea who is a just dancer (which is a marvelous thing), who is a teacher and who's class will make you scream who's your mama!!!  

Missy introduces herself to all of us and asks for our names and then gets us started right away. There are six of us in class - 5 women, 1 man. For the most part unless you are a regular I typically don't give you a name - it's not worth the effort if you aren't coming back. But Mr. Self Important must have a name.

She has start with port de bras for position of plie, which is different but not mind muddling. Then we move into tendus, more tendus, degages with piques and beats, frappes with beats, and rond de jambs. Now while all of this sounds fairly normally, she likes us to hold things in releve.....things like my heavy ass THIGHS!!!

Missy likes to end each combination in releve in coupe or retir or arabesque with or without attitude, which would be fine if my thighs weren't 1/3 of my BODY MASS!

Side Bar: What was that Missy? You want me in retir on releve AND BALANCED?  Ok, how about you can get two of the three....I'd like releve and balance

Menty: We can do it - just stack the bones...

Side Bar: Like you know what the hell that even MEANS!

Physie: Less chatter - MORE matter - I can't hold this if you aren't paying attention!!

The barre portion of class wraps at 7:30ish, we break for water and come back for center floor work. It appears that MDB may be one of few instructors that ACTUALLY starts center floor work with an Adagio. Missy has us start with something that wasn't quite slow but wasn't fast either. It wasn't really difficult but we didn't nail it either.  Missy gives us the adagio which has three arabesques, chasse, pas de bouree, closing in fifth - one in each direction. She makes us do this at least four times, which gives me an ass cramp on the right side. She moves us over to the corner and runs us through one petit allegro and one grande allegro.  

Missy was a lot less hurried but no less challenging than Little Red. And while Little Red makes me want to hide in the woods, Missy's class makes me warn her about the Big Bad Wolf.

On the other hand, MDB would probably have me skipping through the woods holding the basket of food while correcting my grip and yelling TOUCH IT! 

And freak that I am, I miss her :)

Little Red

And I don't mean Riding Hood either!  Little Red was the sub tonight. I'd only seen her twice before....one night chatting with MDB after class and this Sunday before that adventure. Either she's new or I didn't notice her when her hair was say....Brown?? 

There were 8 of us in class a three time return WTF owner, Ashley of the Olsen Twins (Mary Kate was sick tonight), Lil Black Chick, Tall Black Chick (like 6 feet 2 inches tall!), another regular and the lady with the dreads from first company and me. 

Little Red introduces herself, tells us she's the sub tonight and then apparently someone hit the fast forward button on the dvd player because I've never gone so fast through barre before in my SHORT BALLET TAKING LIFE!!! 

We started with plies. Then we moved into several series of tendus (that may have also been degages, but she was wearing dance sneakers so I wasn't sure) and I didn't want to stop and ask because as FAST as we were going I didn't CARE!! I was going to TENDU regardless!!

At one point Little Red says ok let's do it - and I say - ok YOU do it - WE'LL TRY OUR BEST! We all laughed because it was SO true.

Side Bar: Alright - I don't know if that's water in her drinking bottle or LIQUID CRACK, but at the current speed of light we will be done with the barre in less than 15 minutes - which means there will be about 45 minutes of floor work!

Menty: It's definitely a challenge...

Physie: I think I'm getting an ass cramp. 

We move into straight legged frappes, rond de jambes, battements (no stretch in between). And sure enough, we were done with barre by 7:15ish. Head Smack!

Then she says - OH! Class is over at 8:15pm.

Side Bar: So you've been torturing us with whiplash moves because you thought we were going to run outta time? OH!! Ok, that makes sense.....NOT!! ACK! 

So she gives us a lengthy adagio - from right side to left side then left back to right - and then moving it forward and backward. It wasn't too bad. My balance sucked, but I tried my best.

We did two different combinations across the floor with enough complexity and length that we ALL stopped and looked at each other with the WTF face. I think I paused long enough to feel an eighth of an inch of hair growth. But we sucked it up and screwed it up while patiently waiting for her to come to the realization that we are truly BEGINNERS. 

She wanted us to glissade, assemblage - ACK - but when she saw our collective faces - she went back to her Twinkle Toes kid ballet class and made us run in place, then forward, then back, then she made us run with our feet turned out- same routine - then she made us jump which created little jetes!!  And then she made us do assemblages from there, which was different and maybe a better way for me to think about it. 

We ended with one more grand allegro- complex and lengthy - but she said next week she was going to teach us all these little tricks.  Lil Black Chick said she loved every minute of that class because it was fast and full of jumps and leaps.

Part of me (Side Bar and Physie) never wants to take a class with Little Red EVER again, because while my mind is pretty quick - my body is not....may have to do with actually having BREASTS! The other part of me (Menty) says I can do it, I can do it, I can do it. 

I think Menty may be the crazy one......

MDB Squared!

Yes, I typed that. Put on a sports bra, folks! It's going to be a jumpy ride.

MDB is one of seven - in fact the seventh of seven...so the sixth of seven came to class tonight.  She's been reading my regular inner dialogues with witty commentary and great one liners for about two months now. 

Part of me was nervous to meet her in person...one of her most rememberable comments was that she didn't know if I should ditch ballet or not because she hadn't seen me (yet), but if I wasn't I could be a comedian. 

So I'm getting ready for class with my 'dancing future' hanging in the balance!!

Side Bar and Menty are doing a comic duo:

Should I wear the black pants or the stretch denim?

Should I wear two sports bras or one?

Should I wear panties with the extra support or one with padding in case she's a POKER too???

So many decisions!!! I went with all black - pants, TWO bras, top, hoodie (and panties if you were wondering - no padding, but definitely with support!). 

I walk into Joel's place with 10 minutes to spare and I know we are in the back studio. I don't see MDB behind the front desk with David, so I peek around the corner down the long hallway - no MDB and no Mini Blondie MDB Look A Like. 

I round the back corner and get to the glass wall part and I see her - Blondie.  As if it is even remotely possible, she has a slightly smaller frame, smaller face and more boobs. MDB's got her in the booty department though :). She's also about a two inches taller than MDB with blonde hair. I know her the minute I see her and she sees me too. As if I've been hugging her my whole life, we walk right into each other's arms. And like two teenagers that haven't seen each other since yesterday, we babble.  Because I'm teacher's pet, I bring both her and MDB green apples. MDB comes into class and Blondie shows her the green apple, which MDB tries to take, but Blondie's quick and says - NO! This one is MINE! I hand MDB her own and she smiles at the both of us. 

Blondie's phone rings and it's one of the other siblings - possible 3rd, 4th, Sneezy, Sleepy or Sally :) confirming she's in class. I can hear her through the phone - Are you TAKING the Class or WATCHING the Class? I'm TAKING the Class, Blondie says. Well, DON'T HURT YOURSELF! Sneezy, Sleepy or Sally says. 

Side Bar: Don't you just LOVE SIBLINGS? 

Menty: Well..

Side Bar: Shut up - that's a rhetorical question. 

Now it never occurred to me that she would just WATCH. If I'm going to be embarrassing myself in class, I want Blondie right there with me - having her own mental thoughts about the stuff her little sister is saying. 

We line up to the barre and Mrs J is in front of Blondie in this direction and I'll be in front of her when we detournee to the other side. Poor Blondie! I always say I'm not perfect in class. I was doing ok until we got to the straight legged frappes!! I screwed those beats up quite nicely :)...what was my terminology - with confidence and vigor?? 

MDB gave us all corrections including Blondie, which was quite funny because Blondie said at one point - I know she's not talking to me! At which point, MDB walks over to lift my right heel...I say ouch before she touches it. We both laugh - MDB and me because I seriously squeezed my butt cheeks before she stopped by my heel!

We finish the barre with grande battements in attitude and straight legs - no poking incidents. We break for water and give Blondie the low down on what's going to happen next - the center floor work and the traveling floor work. First we have the adagio where MDB tries to break Blondie's arm to get her head in the right direction (not really but she does give it a good crank). 

Then we do Sissones. MDB splits us into group 1 and 2 - me and Blondie are proud members of group 2, Mrs. J joins us because the Swan and the Young One are apparently related to Tigger. We survive that and move into the traveling floor work and then finish up with pique turns.  AND I could actual manage to pique turn to the right (right direction) with less frustration. 

We finish class with a reverence and MDB tells us she will be MIA for two weeks. I squeeze MDB and Blondie tight and wish them a Happy Thanksgiving.  Blondie says I can do anything. 

I think that means I can keep going to Ballet class :) 

Thanks for the great hugs and chit chat Blondie - smooches!! And don't forget to tell Sneezy, Scratchy or Sally that you DID NOT HURT YOURSELF in class!

My Big Girl Panties

When I left for class tonight, it looked like God had decided to give up on making rain drops and poured down buckets of water instead! On top of that, it was 66 degrees outside - on NOVEMBER 22nd in CHICAGO. But it's Chicago - and it (the city) hasn't decided that it is going to play by the rules of nature and it will start and end Fall when it damn well feels like it. 

I walk into Joel Hall and it's very still inside. There is a class in the fishbowl, but all I can hear is the music - no feet making the floor squeak, no applause from class spectators, no people walking around chatting and David isn't on the phone. I've never seen this before. I'm not really sure how I feel about it either.

I go MDB hunting 5 minutes after class start time and I hug her when she rounds the corner. David tells her there is only 2 of us tonight - UNHEARD OF!! And she agrees to teach us anyway.

Side Bar: Uh oh...this can't be good. Just two of us in class? 

Menty: We'll be fine. We could put the Swan in front....

Side Bar: LIKE HELL! The Swan can kiss my grits. She can be in front in Tuesdays class - on the OTHER SIDE.

The Swan and I assume the position - first, that is, with me in front :). We go through our plies with cambres, tendus with plies and forced arched releve onto straight legs and lower back down, then MDB does something wacky with the degages. We go to a demi then flick for eight counts, and then normal and then demi, flick degage fast - then sweeping. 

Side Bar: My BRAIN HURTS! 

Physie: Be thankful she can't touch our brain....anything she touches typically hurts immediately and LATER.

We move into rond de jambes and after we execute them, she tells me that only on my left side do I soften my knee to get it under myself. She then says I need to get 'ON TOP' on my right leg. And then MDB takes her little pointer finger and pushes on my RIGHT TING MUSCLE! That's right - my lower right ass cheek! 

Side Bar: Whoa!

Menty: I think we had that one coming....as many people as we goose....that's just karma. And at least she didn't pinch - she just poked it.

Side Bar: Maybe we should ask for dinner AND A DRINK next time...

<span>Needless to say, I got the correction RIGHT AWAY!!!</span>

We finish with battements and move into the floorwork. MDB asked if there was anything we wanted to work on and the Swan said no - I said I had a list. MDB says 'written or oral?'

Side Bar: WAY TOO MANY JOKE OPTIONS.....

I hesitate - I don't really want to focus on all the crap I do wrong, but there's only three of us. And I'm not really likely to get this kinda one to two attention when class is full. So I put on my Big Girl Panties and say - Sissone, Glissade and Assemblage.  MDB said the Thursday night class said the same thing. But Lil Black Chick added coupe jete turn. 

The Swan is already fairly competent at all these things except the turn, so MDB makes her work them backwards. I, however, work on doing them forward with varying degrees of accuracy. MDB even pulls out this big long stick for me to keep my center.....which just made me feel like a bigger fool - but that's ok. At least it wasn't a dunce hat!

Still in Awe

So I roll into Beginner Ballet with a few minutes to spare and class is full. The new WTF face owner is there as well and I'm glad that I could encourage someone else to stick with it. I don't know how encouraging I can be when I'm still in class screwing up, but maybe I'm not nearly as bad as I think.....BUT DO NOT TAKE MY WORD ON THAT!

Being less afraid and intimidated to go to class does NOT directly relate to improvement of skills per last night! There are just nights when my focus is screwed, but I knew last night was going to be difficult because a close friend is in the hospital. However, I went to class to stay present and in the moment and not worry about things I have no control over.

MDB isn't in class yet because she teaches another class right before. It's about 5 minutes past the start time so I go MDB hunting and find her right outside her last class talking. I walk up behind her, hook her around the waistline and pick her up. I'm wrong - she's about 90lbs soaking wet - not 100. I put her back down because she's still in fact talking to someone else - but she gets the hint ;-).

Class was 8 people and MDB. We even had a guy last night. The men have been falling off, but that's ok - I'm less likely to get accidently hit that way.

I make sure I'm at the front of the barre - right where everyone can follow me in screwing up :) - and we start with the plies. I'm pretty good at NOT screwing up that combination of things after that it goes downhill fast!
MDB has turned into a Master Chef in the Ballet Pastry department and we lowly apprentices are scrambling eggs with spoons instead of forks!! ACK!

Our 'usual' tendus now include demis and flexes that didn't happen with regularity. Our 'usual' degages have rhythms and I'm just going to skip all the NEW SHIT in the rest of the combinations. Needless to say, anyone following me is equally screwed, but I'm screwing up with confidence and vigor!
Side Bar: Oh hell! It's going to be one of those classes!
Menty: Well, we can't be ON every night.
Side Bar: We haven't been ON ANY NIGHT! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??
Menty: We are only 6 MONTHS into class - cut us some slack.
Side Bar: At what point are we going to be GOOD?
Menty: Clarify Good....
Side Bar: Oh Shut Thee Hell Up.

In a rare turn of events, I'm actually happy to step away from the barre. I'm not great at center floorwork or travelling floorwork, but I'm less afraid then I use to be. But I can FEEL THE ANXIETY rolling on the new WTF owner and I can sympathize. Because I have encouraged her to continue, I also feel like I should help her - in a BLIND leading the THE BLIND sorta way.  

The adagio and petit allegro are kinda "every woman and man for themselves"  deal - only MDB is going to be able to assist, correct and answer questions. I stay on the same end of the class and MDB moves me forward because I'm trying to stay in the middle-ish - in no man's land - not front -not back. She moves me forward because WTF girl has long legs. WTF girl has got spunk -she says yes - move forward because I might kick you :-) - I say that's ok - because I'd kick you back ;-) - MDB confirms that I indeed would kick her back ;-) - DAMN STRAIGHT!

When we move into the travelling combos (grand allegro?), I partner with WTF girl and CLARIFY or FURTHER CONFUSE WTF girl. I'm just teacher's pet - not teacher - I can imitate very well - see MDB for questions! We make it through without slamming into each other - or other people - or the wall, mirror, barres or piano. I consider it a small success :)

But throughout class, MDB will do something that is so easy for her and so amazing to me - like hold her leg in high arabesque, or a grand battement that is high as her head, or an extremely flexible chambre back, or grand jete that's a split in the air.....and I think one day I want to be able to do that - even if it's just in class.

I'm still in awe - even if I'm less afraid. See you tonight MDB :-) I'll bring you an apple!

What Goes Up....

I couldn't make it to class last night due to a work responsibility. I couldn't go on Thursday because of a 'Friendship' responsibility, so it's felt like forever since I've been to class. 

I see MDB at the front desk when I walk in. She confirmed that she read my status update (ballet class -$10, ballet slippers-$22, practicing turns without bra-STUPID).

There are 6 of us in class and MDB. All women for a change.  And we have one new victim..ummm...student....ok, I mean the new owner of WTF face. So sad but so true. 

In class tonight, MDB said, "Your body will get it before your mind does." Yup - my body knew I should put on a bra before practicing turns, but my mind is stupid...go figure!

We line up to the barre and warm up with our plies. Then MDB gets creative with the tendus with some additional pointing and flexing. We move to degages with interesting additions and frappes on releve, rond de jambes regular and with whip cream (aka en l'air), and battements with a twist......I think you know where this is headed.

Side Bar: Someone's been in the kitchen again...

Menty: Maybe we should block her from reading these...I've noticed a marked change in the combos since..

Physie: DON"T EVEN THINK OF FINISHING THAT SENTENCE!! 

Side Bar: Hey - I'm just listening for soy latte.

But with all the new arrangements, I almost felt grateful to have started earlier. The combinations in beginner were hard when I first walked in, but these seems to be gaining in complexity in two day intervals!! And I'm not complaining because I like a challenge (and I've already confirmed my intelligence level) but I really would hate to be new girl. 

We return to the springing releve madness. Again, I am wearing great bra coverage, but now my ass is jiggling in reverb instead! Plie, Releve - jiggle, jiggle, jiggle - Plie, Releve-jiggle, jiggle, jiggle...And I can't help but think - STOP THAT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! Because frankly, it feels like my ASS is laughing at me!!

So we walk away from the barre, step to the middle of the floor, and we go into what I call - the nodding head walk, head tilts in the direction of the foot in front -walk front, walk back. It's harder than you think - and trying NOT to overdo it is the other problem. Then MDB introduces my new nemesis - but I can't think of the name - but you start in fifth and JUMP with both feet to one side, land on one and bring the other to close in front. I thought it was an assemble, but as you now know - it's not the same thing. And we had to do it forward and BACK! UGH! I struggled, I tried, I gave sad cat eyes - it laughed at me. Oh well...next week...and definitely with a bra on!

I seem to get the traveling floor combos okay, but I always want to turn in the wrong direction. I always feel like my internal compass is off in ballet. 

And while I seem to be on the up and up, especially with springing releves....apparently my laughing ass is going down, down, down...or jiggle, jiggle, jiggle...