I Cried

I cried after class today. 

I went to Joel Hall today knowing that I wasn't going to be able to do everything. I signed in and saw that the fishbowl was very full. I almost kept my boots on and just walked right back out, but I was already there and this was ballet 1/2. It wasn't Mrs. B's class and I didn't really have any real reason to be afraid. I'd never had class with this instructor and while my overriding desire is always to be comfortable, I know that eventually MDB may not be my teacher forever. I'm going to call this instructor Legs because so far she is the tallest of the female instructors I've ever had at Joel Hall and she's still shorter than me.

I pull out the third ballet barre and with a grand total of 20 people in class, we start. We start with plies (ala MDB style) with first, second, fifth and fourth positions with chambres and circular port de bras. We move into tendus with the switchy feet funny business. We roll through our degages, frappes, rond de jambes and battements along with leg stretches at the barre and on the floor. The combinations (with the exception of the plies) were very different with varying levels of difficulty. I stuck it out.

As we put the barres away, I felt the strongest desire to turn tail and run...again. 

Menty: We are doing fine. Nothing is wrong. Nothing has even gone horribly wrong. 

Neither Side Bar or Physie have a response. The feeling is still there. 

I introduce myself to Legs, let her know that I'm MDB's beginner student and I'm going to brave the floor combinations. I pick a place in the back. The first combination is completely doable. It has tendus in fifth position to the front with a plie, tendus in the back, tendus that cross, and two pirouettes. The second combination is more complicated. Again, I stand in the back. I mock the combination. I try the combination with my group. I am not able to successful handle this combination. The third combination is beyond me. I don't even have the wherewithal to mock it - too many leaps in any combination completely befuddle my mind.

Side Bar: We should probably go now.... 

Menty: No. We don't have to do every combination. But we should at least try. 

Side Bar: We don't even know what the hell is going on?!?!

Menty: We are staying. 

I stand to the side. I watch and mock it with my feet but I don't have the confidence to do it. We do jumps with changments and echappes. I do these at the barre. The last combination involves more jumping to which I sit to the side and starting layering on my clothes. My left knee isn't feeling capable of jumps today, but I stayed to the end. 

And just like any good echappe - I escaped at the end. I blotted from the room and out the door the minute my boots were zipped. I got in my car and I cried. 

I wasn't frustrated. I wasn't angry. I didn't fall down. For all intense purposes, I didn't have a bad class. But I really wanted to do better. I didn't, so I cried. 

On MDB's Suggestion

NO - I didn't go to ballet on Christmas. This post was originally posted on my facebook Tuesday, December 21st. But it occurred to me that it didn't make it to my blog. So here it is 4 days late, but better late than never :)

______________________________________________________

Joel Hall Studio is on holiday schedule - apparently Christmas and the changing of one year to the next is a big hairy deal - who knew? ;)

There will not be beginner ballet and ballet fundamental classes this week or next. I'm bummed - no MDB. Mr. Heinz's class is also on hiatus this week, but I'm thinking that's kinda a blessing - no guilt for skipping :)

I went to the studio yesterday to find the Ballet 1/2 class had been combined with the Ballet 3 class because the Ballet 1/2 teacher couldn't make it. The lady at the desk says Mrs. B will be teaching the combined class. I took one look at the teacher, the students and the fishbowl  - then I promptly put my boots back on and walked back to my car. As I got in my car, Side Bar was about to give me the flux for being holiday chicken but Menty stepped in and told Side Bar to SHUT THEE HELL UP! 

So I get outta bed this morning talking myself into going to the Ballet 1 class. I put on yoga dvd and between poses I pray for courage to go to class and STAY in class. I'm having a 'fat' day so I'm really not in the mood for being surrounded by skinny, but I put on my armor of black and for fun I put on my black and white striped tights. 

I walk in and sign up for class. Remove three layers of clothes and find a spot at the barre away from the windows. The regular instructor is not here again. We have a sub. She teaches at Northeastern. Ms. NE is a little blonde woman with big gray eyes. She says she knows it's a mixed level course due to the holidays and if there is anything unfamiliar to anyone, please let her know. There are approximately 13 people in class. 

And then it starts - plies (starting in second), moving to first, then fourth position with forced arches, plie to releve. Tendus crossed with changing speed and rhythm. More tendus, then frappes, frappes with beats in second, frappes pointed on releve, degages with changing speed, rhythm and funny business with alternating barre leg with outside leg. We do some more funny business with fondus, battements and the adagio at the barre. At this point, I'm seriously considering skipping floor work altogether. We are already 70 minutes, but I'm thinking I can do 20 minutes of floor work certainly.....possibly....maybe???

I walk over to Ms. NE to let her know I'm a beginner and I'm going to stay for the floorwork part. She tells me she hadn't thought I was a beginner.  Then she tells me to let her know if there is anything I don't know in the combinations. 

Side Bar: She's got a head cold - maybe it's affecting her vision too.

Menty: Or maybe we didn't screw up anymore than anyone else in class??

Then she gives us a really lengthy petit allegro. 

Menty: I'm not intimidated. I'm not intimidated. I'm not afraid.

Side Bar: You keep thinking that, Menty......

Physie: Uh oh....

I manage to get it mostly right after doing it two full times in each direction. Then she gives us a really lengthy grand allegro with something called Tour Jete. I tell her that I don't know this move. She demonstrates it and then has me walk it through on both sides with her. 

Side Bar: You better get to CHANTING!!

Menty: We can do it. We can do it. 

We are going over in time but she makes us do it twice in each direction anyway. I manage to get it mostly correct with varying degrees of success on the tour jetes. 

When class was over, one of the ladies that sat out the grand allegro told me I did pretty good for someone that didn't know what a tour jete was. I thanked her for the compliment as I layered up. I thank Ms. NE for the challenging (and sometimes mind boggling) class. She tells me again that she wouldn't have known I was a beginner if I hadn't told her. 

Maybe it is a really bad head cold???

Hello - My Name is Self-Conscious

I waddle into Joel Hall for Ballet Fundamentals tonight. What can I say - I don't like to be cold...eva! It's like the second thing on the things I HATE THE MOST list. Number one being COLD WET FEET in SHOES. UGH!!

But I digress. I check in with a different person at the front desk. David is MIA, but that's ok. I know he's got a show that he's working on. One of the guys that was coming to classes in the summer that I haven't seen in awhile rounds the corner. We speak and apparently I am emitting 'friendliness' hormones because he hugs me and says it's good to see me. 

Side Bar: REALLY? I don't even know your NAME....

Menty: Just go with it. 

Physie: I hugged him back - it's cool. 

Side Bar: That's ok - if we were any more clothing we won't be able to bend our arms!

It looks like it's only going to be 2 of us in MDB's class tonight. A newbie that has made it into her second class this week. She has Jazz training, so I'm just going to call her Jazz for future reference. MDB rounds the corner to ring the cattle bell one more time and Lil Black Chick pops up. MDB starts to give us plies and two more people show up (one guy from second company and one young lady). As we finish our plies, two more women walk into class.  The young lady that came with the guy stepped in front of me at the barre while we were doing plies. And creature of habit that I am, I really wanted to tell her to STEP OFF and get to the BACK OF THE LINE! But I don't - it's the holidays. MDB makes a reference to maybe getting a riding crop for christmas - HAHAHA! I tell her Flirty Girl Fitness is selling a pole for $1 when you buy their fitness dvd :).

THEN two new chicks come in and make a beeline in my direction (again those f***ing friendly hormones!) They are both in leotards. The one chick is in all black - leotard, tights, skirt but nude slippers. The other chick was in a blue leotard with a hawaiian print scarf tied to her waist. 

I give up and move to the back with Lil Black Chick and Second Company Guy. MDB thanks me for moving.  

Side Bar: BA HUMBUG!! They came in late - didn't even ASK if it was OK to come in. And then I had to MOVE to accommodate them - move yo ass to the back! 

The parade starts up again with 7 of us (6 women and 1 man) starting with tendus with demi, full and then two quick crossed (first, second and back fifth - and again in second) with port de bras forward and back. We have to repeat the port de bras because MDB needs to pick with us about something. Then we do the demi to full degages, then full degages, into ACTUAL frappes without the pointed foot or beats (WEEEEEEEE!) - which was great because I needed some VIOLENCE. And MDB always says this is a VIOLENT 'strike' to the floor. I don't think I've ever frapped SO WELL! We move into rond de jambes, barre stretches and battements, which I'm doing degages without flicks. 

When we move into the center floorwork - we are kinda separated - true beginners from experienced beginners. And finally I feel like I'm on the experienced beginner side!! The two leotard chicks exchange WTF faces when MDB starts rolling out the combos.

We move through the combination and do it twice through. We move to the traveling floor combinations and Lil Black Chick and I get separated between the two leotards. After we make one pass of the combination, the all black leotard turns to me and says with what I assumed to be cockiness "Can you believe this is my first class? Can you believe I'm a beginner?" Deadpan I say "Yes, I can tell." And I even smile because I'm thinking just because you DRESS THE PART DOES NOT MAKE YOU SWAN LAKE. Seriously??

We go back across the floor and I continue to engage her in conversation because I am friendly even if I still miffed about being misplaced in class. We move back to center and do a series of pirouettes. We then go back to crossing the floor and we are matched together again and we continue our conversation. At the end of class, she tells the other leotard that she felt like class was really advanced and she thought it would be beginner. She then says she felt like people would be laughing at her. I really didn't spend class watching either of them - the thing that gives everyone away is the FACE. I told her that nobody spends class looking at other people. I don't - but I don't think she believed me. But I didn't give further clarification. Wearing a leotard doesn't make you a dancer - your technique does. And when you don't have much - you don't have to be staring someone down to figure it out.  I speak as one that doesn't have much either!!!! What's that saying - takes ONE to KNOW ONE? Apply freely here! (OK NOW STOP!)

I think when I first started I felt like I was under the spotlight because I felt like I LOOKED SO BAD in comparison to everyone else - but that's only when you're self-conscious. And that's the difference WITH MEbetween MDB's class and Mr. Heinz's class. In MDB's class, I don't really notice everyone else. I'm NOT comparing. In Mr. Heinz's class, I am. 

Another Lesson Learned - it's ok for my ballet experience to be all about me - nobody else (other than the teacher maybe) really cares!

The black leotard did ask me why didn't wear a leotard.

Side Bar answered: Because - I don't like them. 

 She totally had that one coming.

Open Mouth-Insert Foot

MDB made it to class tonight. Once again, I called. I was snuggled down with Baby (my cat) and I called. David answered and confirmed. He even asked if I wanted to talk to her, but I told him verbal confirmation was sufficient. 

So I layered up the clothing, packed up my slippers, confidence and ass - and headed out the door. 

After leaving my wet boots at the door and while signing in, MDB snuck up behind and hugged me. To which I turned all the way around and squeezed her back. I missed her big time. I give her an apple and two holiday lollipops (one is almost the size of her head). It's sorta a bribe not to leave again. I know she left for performances, but Lil Red and Missy are two different forms of torture. And while it's good to branch out and try new teachers - I can't help but have a favorite. I like Mr. Heinz too - in a demented, slightly sadistic - make it hurt, drill sergeant - make it hurt - sorta way. 

So Ms. J and the Swan are in class and we have one newbie. She has dance experience so she's not completely lost in class, but she has her moments of WTF-ness :)

MDB has decided to take it easy on us tonight. There is only the five of us including MDB and a heater. It kinda feels like the gym right before holidays. Fewer people are there. You can have your pick of any machine. My concern is that right as we round the corner into 2011 all the New Years Resolution people will fall from the sky and I'll be pulling barres from the hallway to get a spot. 

MDB starts us off with our usual plies, but she adds some things and changes some things for our tendus with port de bras, degages (ball of foot, flick, then quicker ball of foot with flick, then normal degages), rond de jambs (not en l'air - thank goodness), pointed toe frappes with regular frappes in second alternating and then frappes with beats (I suck at these BIG TIME), leg stretches at barre and then grand battements. I decided to do high degages (without flick) to keep my hips in place. Six months in and battements are still a mystery....but not on the most hated list.

And then in typical MDB style, she says, "I found out in Ballet Russe (Russian Ballet company) that the teachers didn't actually use a cane on their students. They used a riding CROP."

Side Bar: That's IT! Anyone taking a crop to my ass is seriously IN TROUBLE! I gotta pay to embarrass myself and get BEAT for it?!?!?!? You got the WRONG ONE!! 

And then MDB winks at me and says."I gotta live up to my name." 

SO I say,"Well should we get you a pole and some high heels, too?" 

We all laugh. It's so familiar and comfortable. MDB then gives us an adagio with first port de bras with a retir to change direction. We have to do it twice, but at least she isn't yelling TOUCH it!  She mentions fingers dangling in the pool and I immediately get a butt cramp. We go to echappes and then move into traveling floorwork, but I'm having left knee difficulty so I can't jump and land on my left side.  We finish class and talk about the next two weeks - no beginner ballet or fundamentals. 

So here's where I opened my mouth and now I have to insert my foot. Last night's posts was about TBC going to the other classes and telling the teacher she's having an off night. But MDB actually suggested that we go to the morning classes and let the teachers know what level we are and ask if we can just do barre or the whole class depending on how we feel comfortable. 

Sooooo....anyone interested in pulling up a seat with popcorn and soda - I will probably drop into one of those Ballet 1 or Ballet 1/2 classes over the next two weeks. And by the way, rubber tastes disgusting.

Lil Red to the Rescue OR Gettin Off My Soapbox

I called this time. It was a high of 10 degrees today and I thought - to hell with showing up and going home. 

I sent a message to MDB and looked at her response - stuck outta town due to blizzards in Chicago, Lil Red as replacement. And still I called. David answered confirmed and away I went. 

I walk into class and warm up my legs because they are feeling a little stiff. The Young One, Tall Black Chick (TBC), and the Swan walk in as Lil Red rounds the corner and gets in and starts us into our plies. A lone male shows up and moves to the back of the barre line. Lil Black Chick drops her stuff off and I put her in front of me. Lil Red isn't MDB - no need for me to be front tonight.

Lil Red is calmer tonight. Apparently, tonight she was drinking water andNOT liquid crack!

Side Bar: I like her more when she's not so cracked out.

Physie: So does our legs!

 So we move through our plies, tendus with port de bras in all directions, degages - two slow, three fast crossed, rond de jambes with more port de bras (ass tucked under - not sticking out), frappes with rond de jambes en l'air, petit and grande battements. And frankly, my grand battements are high degages for now. 

Now Lil Red has her own visual imagery that she likes to use but all of it is hip hop related. And while I like to WATCH hip hop, I can keep a beat and shake my tail feathers in the clubs - I'm fluent in belly dance terminology! I am STILL MAKING REFERENCES to my ballet book. I don't know JACK SHIT about battles, crews, etc. 

Additionally, Lil Red likes to say "we can all count" -sssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttt!!  Maybe she hasn't taken a good look around this class. Now most times, I would say black folks got rhythm (just like black women don't do swimming)- but seriously the LONE male and (Tall Black Chick)TBC - they either can't count or their timing is ALWAYS OFF! That being typed, different forms of dance use music differently - where you prep, when you're moving, how your moving, etc. Part of learning how to do a particular style of dance also means learning HOW THEY USE THEIR MUSIC. Ok, I'm off the soapbox. 

We move away from the barre and do the 'not adagio and not petit allegro' thingy and Lil Red asks us if we want an adagio. And having been through TWO OTHER Lil Red classes, Side Bar immediately speak up - HELL YES, PLEASE!! THANK YOU! UMMM HMMM!!  We go through an adagio, jumps first (no echappes), and then we do the running exercise that makes jetes, assemblages and sissones less mind bobbling and more user friendly. We make it through the petit allegro, grande allegro and finish with a reverence. 

Lil Red announces that there will not be beginner ballet for two weeks. I have a flyer with alternate classes listed. None of them are beginner. The other classes are Ballet 1/2. I mention this to TBC. She tells me she's going to go anyway - and just tell the teacher she's having an off night if they say something......

Side Bar: Apparently TBC has been smoking weed laced CRACK! NO BALLET INSTRUCTOR in their RIGHT MIND would look at her and think she was having an OFF NIGHT!! 

Menty: Typically, I'm the friendly supportive one - but I'm with YOU on that one!! She's been in classes for TWO WEEKS!! SERIOUSLY??

Side Bar: She doesn't know a plie from a pas de bournee, a tendu from a fondu pot or a chasse from a damn chaise lounge. But good luck anyway. 

So I actually say - which ones are you thinking about going to?

TBC didn't know just yet. I was just asking so I can pull up a chair, some popcorn and a soda. I just know it's going to be funny as hell. 

Ok, I'm off my soapbox. 

Just Being Me

My intermediate tribal belly dancing class was cancelled this evening, so I found myself at liberty to thoroughly embarrass myself in Mr. Heinz's class tonight. 

I waffled back and forth between staying home and going through my Rachel Brice Serpertine Drills or going to Mr. Heinz's class. So I pulled out the syrup and strawberries and ate my waffles - then I decided to go to Mr. Heinz's class. (Ok, I didn't actually eat waffles - but I would have if I had any!) 

I put on a cream v-neck extra long sweater top/dress and then layer on a coat, thermal socks, boots, scarf, wristlets, head scarf, hat, earmuffs and gloves. When I arrive inside the studio, I ask one of the owners if class is going to go - but I can see everyone that's typically there and I know, but I still ask -just in case.  Yes, class is going to go. And I'm welcomed back which makes me smile - I'm still not forgotten - but there are some other outstanding factors there - number one being I'm the only one dancing in belly dance pants tied in bows at the knee. 

So here I am doing the winter strip tease - I'm hopping to get my boots off along with the thermal socks, swinging my arms around my head trying to free myself from the 20 foot long scarf, shrugging out of my coat and pulling on my forearms to get my wristlets off and for the finale - the moment no one is really waiting for.........my gloves! So anti-climatic, right?

We walk into class and go to our respective barres. I'm back to my spot on the wall - I can see Mr. Heinz and everyone else while hopefully maintaining a low profile being on the wall instead of the middle of the floor. It doesn't really matter. Mr Heinz like MDB walks the floor making corrections. 

We start with battement in attitude in first position - back and forth - both sides.  We tendu with plies, we plie with releve, we passes with plie. Mr. Heinz conveniently catches the releve bug that Missy had last week - everything in releve - you could pick your poison - anything that could be done - is done - retir, coupe, arabesque (front and back), developpe, passe. All of this requires stability and strength. Tonight I don't have much of either.

Side Bar: Alright - what the hell is up with all these releves?!?

Menty: We're doing alright.

Side Bar: Oh shit - here he comes. Pretend to know what you're doing!!!!

By the end of barre, my ass is positively HUMMING due to all the squeezing I must do to keep my core intact - and trust me -it ain't humming a gospel hymn either!

Mr. Heinz makes a joke about one of us saying we aren't coming back to this class - to which Side Bar replies - HOW'D YOU KNOW?? Everyone laughs. One of the ladies closest to me laughs and gives me the wide eyed look (like she couldn't believe I said it!) She doesn't know Side Bar yet....

We make it through barre and stretch for about 5 minutes on our own. Now comes the part that makes me want to run out the window ala Roger Rabbit - floorwork. I actually ask Mr. Heinz where he is going to stand in class because I want to be opposite. He thinks this is funny - I think it is prudent planning.

Our adagio has eight tendus forward and back and eight degages forward and back. I'm so thankful for the easy combination and then I realize someone else has WTF face. I could almost thank Ethereal for sending a newbie to this class. Mr. Heinz pretty much kills me with pirouettes and sissones. Then he finished us off with spins - and I almost turn in the wrong direction to start!! He actually walked over and turned me in the right direction! So EMBARRASSING!! 

Class wraps with stretching and I chat it up with one of the little ladies that does splits before classes. She's kinda spunky and funny. She also super talented and will probably be a ballerina one day. So I offered her a ride home. I think I'm going to call her Spunk.

When I first came, everyone was quiet and a little reserved, but maybe I was too. Tonight I didn't want to shut up and disappear - so I didn't. I was just me - funny, smiling, making mistakes and jokes. I had a good time. 

I pull on my eight layers of clothing and say good night to everyone and let them know I would probably see them in January, which actually gets groans of why?  I told Mr. Heinz I would see him at his next performance this month. He stood up and we hugged briefly. I guess I did good - or he really does only hug me when I tell him I'm going to be gone for 2 month intervals.....CRAP!! 

Half Way to....Where was I going??

I layered and layered, shivered and shook, drove and ran to my beginner ballet class tonight....and it was cancelled. I was the only person waiting for ballet to start, so I came home, cooked dinner (instead of doing yoga) and decided to type. 

I've decided that I'm going to end this ballet adventure one year from the date I first mustered up the courage to take my first class. So this is technically the midway or a little pass midway point. I walked into class the last week of May 2010. 

When I first started, I was full of apprehension, fear and uncertainty. What if I'm the 'fat' one? What if it's really hard? What if I'm bad at it? What if they want me to wear a leotard? What if I have to wear PINK?!?!?

WHAT IF???  

And what I know is - IF I never made the attempt, I would have always regretted not trying. 

There has been doubt, fear, aches, pain and tears.

I've gone home from my ballet classes- feeling fat, feeling despair, feeling uncertain, doubting my talent, doubting my body, wanting to quit, wanting to scream, wanting to throw up my hands and wanting McDonald's large fries and a caramel sundae - with nuts.

I have also gone home - feeling proud, feeling tired, feeling victorious, feeling competent, feeling happy to be alive, feeling stronger, and being so achy that I turned into a prune in the bathtub because I had to figure out if I could ROLL up the SIDE!! (AND I CAN! but it's really embarrassing!)

And even as I type this, I know I'm going to go to Mr Heinz class tomorrow (assuming it will go if anyone other than me shows up), but I still have doubts. My last class with him I did so much better that he actually hugged me when it was over. Side Bar chimes in - maybe it was because you told him you won't be back for 2 months??

In MDB's class, I feel safe. I make mistakes. I bitch about assemblages, sissones and glissades. I can openly hate those things and be afraid of echappes.

In Mr Heinz's class where everyone is beyond beginner in the BEGINNER CLASS, I feel like the weakest link. Like I need to shut up and disappear, even though Side Bar refuses to be cowed into silence. When I go to his class, I need my armor - I need to be in black, I need to have two sports bra, I need to be in Spanx so my ass doesn't laugh at me when I'm doing springing releves!!! And knowing all of this - I will go because I refuse to be 'afraid' to try. 

So I've learned that I don't have to be afraid to try. Even the best dancers aren't perfect - they still make mistakes. WHAT IF is a terrible way to let my life go by. The size of my thighs (imagined or real) will not stop me from going to class. Practice doesn't make perfect, but as close to perfection as ANYONE can get. I can really do anything that I want as long as I'm not afraid. 

So this is me - halfway to finishing my beginner adventure. I don't know what I will type when I get to that last week in May 2011. I don't know what else I will learn. But I want to continue learning, growing and testing my boundaries, so I will. 

Thank you to everyone that has commented, liked, or read these notes. It's like having a support team at my fingertips that can confirm I'm crazy as hell, but think it's great that I'm doing it anyway. 

Little Red-The Remix

I forget how cold Chicago can be in the winter. I remember the salt. I remember digging out my car. I definitely remember snow - but for some weird wacky ass reason - I forget that it can be BUTT BITING COLD AS HELL OUTSIDE.

At a whopping 17 degrees at 6:10pm, I'm layered in a footless tights, bellydance pants, tank, little hoodie, wool peacoat, 20 foot long scarf that wraps around my neck at least 10 times, knee high socks, furry boots, earmuffs, gloves and the holy spirit! 

I walk into Joel Hall and sigh a soft but exaggerated sigh of relief for the heat. Bless you Peoples Gas!! I slowly beginning to unwrap myself like a kid would unwrap a lump of coal as a christmas present. 

Lil Red is in class and she apologized for last week - MDB didn't mention it was a Beginner/Ballet 1 class (I bet she didn't! Probably wanted to see what I was going to write!)-and that she would go much slower this time. 

I line up to the barre and I don't want to be in the front today. Although I know Lil Red means well - she's kinda jittery like a kid hopped up on candy - aka I still think shit is going to go WAY TOO FAST. I need not have worried. Quite a few newbies come to class today which makes me smile - oh WTF face on someone else for a change - PERFECT!

Side Bar: Looks like we are going to catch a break tonight! Newbies!!

Menty: Someone of these people look like they have experience.

Side Bar: Anyone can wear the uniform....

There is seven people in class tonight - 6 women and 1 man - the other Olsen Twin (Mary Kate) has made it tonight (Ashley was taking a breather), the Swan and myself are the only regulars in class. 

Lil Red did take it easier on us in class tonight. She started with normal plies (at a NORMAL SPEED TOO), and added a forced arch in there. We did two different sets of tendus, degages, coupes, straight legged frappes with coupe, rond de jambes and rond de jambes en l'air.  Lil Red did make the combinations slower and when we got to the rond de jambes en l'air, she said that we would feel it tomorrow. I said I will feel it tonight! 

When we move to the center floor work, we skip the adagio and start with something that's not quite slow and not quite fast. The newbies and the Swan wanted to do turns so we skip the adagio and do pirouettes with and without plies to start - UGH! My left knee wasn't feeling stable and I left my knee pad at home so I just had to coupe instead on the left side. Then they did jumps at the center - I went to the barre. 

Then Lil Red went back to my two of my frienemies - Glissade and Assemblage. And I actually was able to do them without hating them so intensely that my ass did not lock and my legs could actually move!!

So when it was all said and done, I definitely liked Lil Red off the candy. She had moments where she looked like she couldn't handle the slowness, but she managed. 

And she reminded us twice that her birthday is coming up - MDB - she wants more ballet music....just in case you were wondering :)

And PS - from the time that I started to now - somehow I've managed to lose 11 lbs without trying. Take that super huge thighs!

Miss C or Missy

It was OH MY GOODNESS Cold outside tonight. At 5:36pm I made the decision to go to class anyway. MDB went through the hassle of finding subs, the least I can do is take my tuchus to class.

I walk in, register and head to Studio B. As I watch the pointe class dance to Sugar Plum fairies , I think about my upcoming trip to see the Nutcracker. I'm kinda looking forward to watching ballerinas crack nuts!! :) While I'm watching these feets of strength (pun intended), I'm unwinding my scarf, pulling off my gloves, unzipping my boots, rolling down my socks, and unbuttoning my coat - and just before you think this is a strip tease....let me remind you - it was 27 degrees outside!!  

Two regulars and one regular that has been MIA for a while are sitting with me on the bench watching the dancers. Three other people round the corner and one of them is our sub.  

Last night we had Little Red, tonight we had Miss C or Missy - if you say it quickly :)

She's about as tall as Little Red, but a brunette with blonde streaks in her hair. I've seen her around a lot, but I have little to no idea who is a just dancer (which is a marvelous thing), who is a teacher and who's class will make you scream who's your mama!!!  

Missy introduces herself to all of us and asks for our names and then gets us started right away. There are six of us in class - 5 women, 1 man. For the most part unless you are a regular I typically don't give you a name - it's not worth the effort if you aren't coming back. But Mr. Self Important must have a name.

She has start with port de bras for position of plie, which is different but not mind muddling. Then we move into tendus, more tendus, degages with piques and beats, frappes with beats, and rond de jambs. Now while all of this sounds fairly normally, she likes us to hold things in releve.....things like my heavy ass THIGHS!!!

Missy likes to end each combination in releve in coupe or retir or arabesque with or without attitude, which would be fine if my thighs weren't 1/3 of my BODY MASS!

Side Bar: What was that Missy? You want me in retir on releve AND BALANCED?  Ok, how about you can get two of the three....I'd like releve and balance

Menty: We can do it - just stack the bones...

Side Bar: Like you know what the hell that even MEANS!

Physie: Less chatter - MORE matter - I can't hold this if you aren't paying attention!!

The barre portion of class wraps at 7:30ish, we break for water and come back for center floor work. It appears that MDB may be one of few instructors that ACTUALLY starts center floor work with an Adagio. Missy has us start with something that wasn't quite slow but wasn't fast either. It wasn't really difficult but we didn't nail it either.  Missy gives us the adagio which has three arabesques, chasse, pas de bouree, closing in fifth - one in each direction. She makes us do this at least four times, which gives me an ass cramp on the right side. She moves us over to the corner and runs us through one petit allegro and one grande allegro.  

Missy was a lot less hurried but no less challenging than Little Red. And while Little Red makes me want to hide in the woods, Missy's class makes me warn her about the Big Bad Wolf.

On the other hand, MDB would probably have me skipping through the woods holding the basket of food while correcting my grip and yelling TOUCH IT! 

And freak that I am, I miss her :)